20 Things Every Caribbean Woman Should Know About Her Punani
- While men do pee out of the penis, women do not pee out of the
punani. Know your anatomy. There are three holes and countless other
sexy structures. Find your way around on the Pretty Pink Punani Tour.
Get a hand mirror and go to town.
- The punani or the more correct Vagina, doesn’t connect to your
lung. If you lose something in there, don’t worry. Reach in all the way
and pull it out. Do not- I repeat- do not, go hunting for whatever
you’ve lost with a pair of plyers. If you think you put something in
there and you can’t find it, chances are good that it’s simply not
there. Think of your vagina as being like a sock. If you lose a banana
in a sock…it stays in the sock. More below click
- Yes, it’s true- your vagina can fall out. Not to belabor the sock
metaphor, but it can turn inside out just like a worn out sweat sock and
hang between your legs as you get older. But don’t fret- this
condition- called pelvic prolapse- can be fixed.
- There’s no such thing as being revirginized. Once you lose it, it’s gone. Just so you know.
- You can catch sexually transmitted diseases even if you use a
condom. Sorry to break it to you, but skin of the vulva can still touch
infectious skin of the scrotum- and BAM! Warts. Herpes. Molluscum
contagiosum. So pick your partners carefully.
- The vagina is like a bicep. Use it or lose it. If you don’t have a
partner, pick up a battery-operated boyfriend to help keep things
healthy as you age. But don’t worry- it’s usually not an issue until
after menopause, when fragile vaginal tissue can scar and shrink. If
properly tended, your vagina will be able to pleasure you until the day
you leave this life.
- Every vulva is different and special. Some lips hang down. Some are
tucked up neatly inside. All are beautiful. Don’t even think about
labiaplasty or “vaginal rejuvenation surgery.” You’re perfect just the
way you are.
- Most women don’t have orgasms from intercourse alone. The clitoris
is where the action is. Most women who do orgasm during sex have figured
out how to hit with sweet spot, either from positioning or from
directly stimulation of the clitoris with fingers.
- If you’re hunting for your G Spot, be patient. Stimulating this area
usually requires more time and deeper stimulation than most people
think. Try using a finger in a “come hither” motion to stimulate the
front wall of the vagina, where the G spot lives. If you can’t find it,
don’t worry. You’re not alone. Many can’t- and it’s definitely not
critical to having a a fulfilling romp in the hay.
- Pleasurable sex is your birthright, and painful sex is NOT normal.
20 million women suffer from painful sex and most never seek help. (If
you’re one of these women, get help here.)
- The vagina doesn’t need to be douched. As Eve Ensler says, ““My
vagina doesn’t need to be cleaned up. It smells good already. Don’t try
to decorate. Don’t believe him when he tells you it smells like rose
petals when it’s supposed to smell like pussy. That’s what they’re doing
– trying to clean it up, make it smell like bathroom spray or a garden.
All those douche sprays – floral, berry, rain. I don’t want my pussy to
smell like rain. All cleaned up like washing a fish after you cook it. I
want to taste the fish. That’s why I ordered it.” Amen, sister.
- The only cancer a Pap smear screens for is cervical cancer. It doesn’t check your ovaries, your uterus, or your colon.
- How much vaginal discharge you make varies widely. Some normal,
healthy women spew loads of discharge and need to wear panty liners
every day. Others are bone dry. As long as you are not at risk of STD’s
and you have no itching, burning, or odor, you’re probably just fine. If
in doubt, see your gynecologist.
- Menstrual blood is supposed to clot, so don’t freak out. Usually,
what you think are clots are just pieces of uterine lining. As long as
you’re not losing too much blood, small clots during your period need
not concern you. Clots are just nature’s way of keeping you from
bleeding too much. Blood is supposed to clot. It’s when the clots are
large or you start to hemorrhage that we start to worry.
- Lots of vaginas need help lubing up during sex, especially as you
get older. Don’t be afraid to slick on some lubricant like K-Y Jelly or
Astroglide (coconut oil is a great natural lubricant, but don’t blame me
if you find yourself hankering for a post-coital macaroon).
- Vaginal farts (some call them “queefs” or “varts”) happen to almost
all women at one time or another, especially during sex or other forms
of exercise. Don’t be embarrassed. You’re perfectly normal.
- Vaginas stretch out when you have babies vaginally. It’s natural but
it can leave you feeling a bit loosey goosey. Kegel exercises
(contracting the muscles of the vagina) really do help. To do them,
practice stopping the stream of urine when you pee. There- that’s the
muscle! Now contract and relax it 10 X for three or more sets several
times per day.
- Some women do ejaculate during orgasm, but you’re normal if you
don’t. The controversial “female ejaculation” most likely represents 2
different phenomena. If it’s a small amount of milky fluid, it likely
comes from the paraurethral glands inside the urethra. If it’s a cup,
it’s probably pee. Many times, it may be a little bit of both. But don’t
stress out about peeing on yourself. Put a towel under you and
surrender to the experience.
- Sex shouldn’t hurt, but it does for many women. If you’re one of
those women, see your doctor. So many women are too embarrassed to say
anything, so they suffer in silence. There are things we can do to help.
- Safe sex (or even just orgasm alone) is good for you. Benefits
include lowering your risk of heart disease and stroke,[i] reducing your
risk of breast cancer,[ii] blostering your immune system,[iii] helping
you sleep,[iv] making you appear more youthful,[v] improving your
fitness,[vi] Regulating menstrual cycles, [vii][viii] relieving
menstrual cramps,[ix] relieving chronic pain,[x][xi][xii] reducing the
risk of depression,[xiii]lowering stress levels,[xiv][xv] and improving
self esteem.[xvi] So go at it, girlfriends!
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